March 28, 2010

Solution to the Latest Church Scandal

New Bumper Sticker Remover

A Warm Greeting for Grandpa


THIS OUGHT TO MAKE ALL GRANDPAS FEEL WARM & FUZZY....

A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother, to visit her Grandpa.

When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into her Grandpa's room...

"Grandpa, Grandpa," she says excitedly,

"As soon as Grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!"

"What?" said her Grandpa.

"Make a noise like a frog…… because Grandma said that as soon as you croak, we're all going to Disneyland "

Kinda brings a tear to your eye doesn't it.?

New Toyota Tshirt

Big Effing Deal Bill

Builder throws SAWBLADE through 2x4!

March 27, 2010

Pelosium

Heaviest Element Yet Known to Science Discovered

February 28, 2010 - 14:09 ET

Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in California has now identified with certainty the heaviest element known to science.

The new element, Pelosium (PL), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Pelosium is inert, and has no charge and no magnetism. Nevertheless, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Pelosium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Pelosium has a normal half-life of 2 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a biennial reorganization In which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

Pelosium mass will increase over time, since each reorganization will promote many morons to become isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Pelosium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.

This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Pelosium becomes Senatorium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Pelosium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

March 22, 2010

Dell Tech Support Call

Naughty Language Warning!!

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